Dr. Agbenyo:
Left to die
“I will not make the mistake of sending anyone who needs urgent help to the hospital because I will be held responsible for their care and I am not prepared to bear their bills “.
This is the common response I got last Sunday from the onlookers at a popular lorry station when I chanced upon a man convulsing on the floor with blood oozing from his mouth and forehead at a popular lorry station to my question(as to why they looked on unconcerned?). I made an arrangement to get him to the hospital and even that, no one was willing to help me move him into my car. Luckily, the seizures ceased and he got up and walked off when someone poured cold water on him.
๐ก Have we become a nation without conscience?
Do I have the feeling that we as people appear to have lost our way, making us oblivious to other people?
๐Have we lost the certainty of hope and aspirations and moral fibre and in their place now exhibiting deepโseated cynicism and disillusionment?
๐Why are we plunged into a time of political uncertainty and economic distress, of widening difference between rich and poor, and sporadic violence and threats?
๐Do I have a feeling that we have become a people with seared conscience or it’s all a figment of my imagination?
๐Have we set up a failed system with the potential to annihilate us over time?
๐Is it true that anyone who volunteers to send an injured/critically ill or any person who needs an urgent help to the hospital is made to take full responsibility for their care? If so, is that the best thing to do?
๐Isn’t it true that even with the healthiest and the most up to date on health checks among us, none can predict when we may be involved in an accident or find ourselves in a critical health situation requiring movement to the hospital with no close relatives/associates around?
๐How can we be so religious, and yet, allow lack of compassion towards our fellow human beings to permeate deeply to the detriment of our very survival?
๐Are we not worried that when our collective good is lost, our existence becomes shaky?
๐Isn’t it a fact that when a nation loses its collective conscience, truth is suppressed and depravity becomes accepted and systematic destruction is subtly or overtly approved?
๐How reliable is any politics without principle; any religion without compassion; and any education without the skills to solve the myriad of problems which confront us?
๐What will it take to wake us up from our deepening selfish slumber? When are we going to demand for a health system which does not know tribe, clan, creed nor colour? Or do we think that we shall always be conscious and manipulate the system in our favour? Has it occurred to us that the man in the story could have been any of us?
๐What are we doing to make the systems safe for all? Isn’t it about time we put people before profit?
๐isn’t it about time we came together to find solutions to the very large proportion of the people who are disadvantaged, dispossessed, dislocated and disoriented?
๐The time to wake up from our sleeping conscience is now or we must stop believing in any genuine increase.
๐ก Serenity ๐ฏ๏ธ
In the current global arena where survival of the fittest seems to be the order of the day, many of us appear to be deeply asleep when it comes to other people’s needs. We are fooled by the systematic desensitization going on.
Our unwillingness to acknowledge that our collective good is the only surest way to a purposeful increase is the reason why we keep sleeping while many perish. Amen.
[7:20 pm, 27/01/2022] Pope Gynaecologist Evans Agbenyo: ๐น Pope evansio’s reflection
๐งญ 2022 week 5
โบ Powered by positive selfishness
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Living with my decisions
Inability to say NO was one of my greatest weaknesses. I used to please people all the time even though some brought me untold hardship. People pleasing influenced some very key decisions of my life. There were people/things I should have let go a long way back(my Lots) but I held on to them. It made me have so many ‘to do lists’ on my table which made it impossible to meet timelines and had to disappoint the same people I was trying so hard to please. It also burnt me out physically, mentally, socially and professionally.
Although series of life’s setbacks/calamities pushed me to learn to say no, some of the decisions I made in my life(in an attempt to please others) still live with me and give me sleepless nights at times.
The timely advice
After a major setback, a friendly discussion I had with someone hit me like a tsunami and enabled me to reprioritize (though not completely cured ๐). I was impressed upon to spend a few minutes to plan my day before getting out of bed and to reflect over the daily activities before retiring to bed. I struggled with it initially but consistency helped me to weed out some of the people/things which were excess baggage and weighed heavily on my health.
Is it about time you reprioritized too?
Many of us struggle to say no too but it’s crucial to be able to say no so as to feel empowered while still maintaining healthy relationships with others. Saying no enables us to establish healthy boundaries and gives clarity about what other people can expect from us.
๐It’s easier for people who do not care about their integrity to keep promising because they are certain they won’t be fulfilled. But if your word is your bond and also thorough in your output, not being able to say no will certainly wear you down and affect your effectiveness.
๐Are we making some people/things priorities when to them, we are only options? Spending our very limited time and already taxed energy on other peopleโs priorities, while our own priorities fall to the wayside, will gradually make us exhausted and lose our essence of life.
๐Do we feel pressed from all sides? Do we feel overwhelmingly helpless and keep blaming all on circumstances and other people? Do we know that it’s within our power to turn things around?
๐ Following the advice I was given maybe very helpful but to make it so, we need a bit of discipline on our side. Knowing our life’s purpose might be a game changer though.
๐We must begin each day with some me time to reassess our priorities and elect to unpack some people/things who are just energy drainers.
๐ It’s nice to appreciate the confidence some people have in us by their requests/invitation but if these are not inline with our priorities, we must respectfully but firmly learn to say no and stick to it(we must be as resolute as they are pushy and explain to them that you are not rejecting them but their requests/invitation which are not in consonant with your priorities this time).
๐ Sometimes the reason why we cannot say no is because we fear missing out on opportunities. Granted that saying no may come with a missed opportunity, but have we considered the greater opportunities we might also be missing simultaneously by saying yes? It could also be because we want to fit in, avoid conflict or get validation. As long as our priorities are set right, saying no to some things/people could be great tradeoffs.
๐ What will it take to learn to say no especially if the person asking doesnโt give up easily? Won’t we feel bad or feel like we are letting someone down or not living up to their expectations?
๐Are we burning out and/or making poor decisions because we cannot say no to some things/people? Is it really helping us maintain a good health and balance? Isn’t it perhaps about time we reprioritized in order to experience a true increase by spending our energy/resources on things/people who align with our purpose? Don’t you think that reflection on each day’s activity before we sleep will help us to gain mastery over our journey to full self rediscovery?
๐ฏ๏ธ Serenity ๐ก
Why must we keep complicating our lives because we have not set limits and refocused on the needful? We must be so Purpose-driven to the point that we can confidently learn to say no to the good so that we can clear ourselves to say yes to our best. Amen
